The midterm portfolios are graded! I only had to fail two students! I'm a little scared that one of them is going to flip out on me tomorrow, and I'm not sure how to avoid it. I think I'm going to hand the portfolios back on their way out the door, to at least keep it to a minimum of crowd around my desk. And tell them I'll spend an extra hour in my office tomorrow after class, even though I don't want to do anything of the kind, what with the walk back home afterward and the extreme lack of sleep for the last week.

I saved my favorite students' portfolios for last. They restore my faith in humanity and the educational system. The student who is just thrilled that I give so much creative freedom in my class and makes me laugh hysterically. The student who received my first A+ bestowed ever for his analysis of presidential campaign ads. The girl talking about images of violence against women in high-end fashion advertising. And the student who used the word coalesce. Correctly. And also started his essay out "We, as human beings, tend to assume things. We tend to assume that our water is clean, that our doctors are trustworthy, and that our pets really do like us." I shouldn't do that without his permission, but it's only two sentences, and they're fantastic and I want to share them with the diary reading world. I was so disheartened after reading sentences starting "when I right a paper..." and having a student tell me that there are no heroes in his movie but if he had to pick one it would be X. Oh, and the student who plagiarized a quote from William fucking Burroughs, like I might not notice he threw the word "transmutation" in his paper?! Then I started reading the portfolios I knew were going to be good, and at least I know I got through to four or five students. And hell, at least I did that.

I try to recruit the good ones to the English program. I feel guilty, though, trying to lure kids away from engineering, biochemistry, careers where they'll actually potentially make money, and not have to struggle like I know I'm going to be doing for the rest of my life. If it's the last thing I do, though, I'm getting D-- to become a novelist, or a poet. I'm pushing the creative writing concentration for him. Partly, because I want to be his mentor, but also because I feel like he has a fantastic grasp of language and love of playing with it that needs to be encouraged. I could be teaching the next (insert your favorite modern writer here). If I was his age, we'd have to be best friends. Hell, I'm twelve years older than he is, and I still want us to be friends.

I have to be up in six hours to cover Charity's class (her brother's getting married), so I better get some sleep.

2:07 a.m. - 2008-10-10